WATCH YOURSELF
Tuesday, November 3, 2009, 8:21 PM
I'm in sort of a tight place right now. I knew it last year that I would struggle in my classes. That would have been fine if I didn't have apps and senior project to worry about also. Oh, and add in all the stuff at home too and I'm more than a busy senior, I'm a stressed senior and that is not cool. Yeah, I spend 40 minutes typing about my day but I need to do this. Like I said, it's therapeutic. But, I need to prioritize today and tomorrow. Stupid classes.
I woke up this morning somewhere at 5AM. Thought about getting up but ended up sleeping again. Got up at 6:08AM. Took some time and got to physics before everyone else except for one guy. Sometimes I don't like smarter-than-me people. But you know, I can't hate so many people in one day. In physics, this possum played like she did work. Didn't really accomplish much. Later on tonight I better get some help from the internet. Don't want to fail this class but right now I have a 52%. Need a graphing calculator for this class. But the one we have here is a TI-83... I like TI-84's. Oh, it doesn't matter. So... vectors, right? I don't want to fail this class. Don't know how to get that 'success' mindset drilled in.
DP day, they read over my personal statement draft and while I penned that down yesterday during the time we were supposed to be rehearsing for the Parent Night, she thought it was good and the only thing I need is to include myself more. And then I can whittle it down to 250 words. Ha. Ended up telling yet another person about my personal stuff. Do I want all this to blow up on me later? I don't know but I need to cool it from now on. Damn, I'm going to be in a big mess. Hey, this sort of connects to my essay topic for sixth. Ha.
Fourth period we ran the mile. A different track this time. The one I used to run around in middle school. Did 13 mins 14 secs this time. My best time, maybe because this one was so easy. But, I improved so it was nice. Played badminton and I sucked. Lunch, well, I'm sorry.
Sixth period. Got to sit next to him. Again, smile. In second period not much contact but there never really is any in that class. So, sixth period. Class is in different places in their essays. Somehow I got stuck with a slow computer. Ended up opening 14 Microsoft Words. But I got to typing and was pretty fast. Both sides of me were filled up with people other than him but when the girl to my right moved back into the classroom he moved from his computer and sits next to me. But I asked him why he moved and he's like "Why did I move?" Or something along the lines of. He talks too quietly. Ahhh, it was kind of weird trying to undo the mess I made while he's reading my essay. I need to change it bad. Maybe I'll reflect some personal inspiration into it and write about how putting trust into the wrong hands will lead to consequences and embarrassment. Yeah, maybe I'll do that. Well, at the end of class he seemed a bit distant and detached, maybe sad isn't the word to describe it but he looked sad to me. I know, I was staring. He didn't say goodbye to me but it didn't make me sad. Maybe a little bit because I brought it up later but still, like the friend who said my life said to me, "You'll see him tomorrow" and everything will be good again.
The NHS meeting AKA the meeting where high achieving students don't show up on a regular basis except for the officers and a couple of others, we talked about norms and mission and things like that. Finished in time for me to take the 3PM metro and go home. Felt kind of down-age. I don't know, went home and everything is okay again. Got to see my favorite people. On the computer while eating beansprouts (is that what they are called)and then some cake. Yeah.
The rest of my night will consist of homework, homework, homework. Going to get some work done, go to sleep feeling like I accomplished more than I did at school. Tomorrow is a 1,3,5 day and am a little bit worried about calc because we didn't do anything on Monday. Hope teacher forgets and moves on... you know... like what he does all the time?
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